In My Weakness

Being sick and exhausted through these beginning weeks of pregnancy has not only been an experience in physical weakness, but also mental weakness for me.  Feeling badly has given me moments of serious discouragement.  I simply love to do and being mostly immobile and inactive has been very hard for me.  At times the sickness was overwhelming to the point of preventing me from concentrating at all.  Rather than turning to Christ for comfort through scripture, prayer, music, I found myself seeking mindless distractions.  In so doing, I think I opened myself up to even more trouble.  A mind left unchecked or spiritually set is not only a wasteland, but a breeding ground for lies.  No wonder I was discouraged.

Romans 8:5-6 “For those who are according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit.  For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace.”

I find myself wishing I had responded differently, but am grateful that Christ revealed this tendency to me during this time.  He used a time where I felt completely out of control to remind me that He is always in control.  His plan is better than mine.  The coming baby isn’t the only part of His plan, even these weeks of weakness were for His glory.  This baby is His plan for our family and one that we’re excited to see unfold over the coming weeks, months, years. 

I’m still feeling sick, kind of a lot.  I’m still tired, also a lot.  We all know when our new baby is in my arms, I’ll be tired then too. Blissfully happy, but tired. 🙂 It’s important that my mental and spiritual strength is not defined by my physical stamina.  Time spent with God submitting my mind and thoughts through regular reading of the Bible, prayer, and worship will set my mind with a strength beyond myself. 

Colossians 3:2 “Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth.”

Isaiah 40:31 “Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary.”

While weak, rest is key.  Not simply resting, but resting in God. Letting His strength be my strength.  After all isn’t my physical weakness just a reminder of my spiritual weakness, even when I feel strong? There is no replacement for relying on God and His power.  My own strength will never be enough to withstand what wearies me.  

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 “And He has said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.’ Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.”

I’m grateful for this time that has served as a reminder to lean on Him and to not forego our time together.  Do you also need a reminder to focus beyond your circumstances?  Be encouraged!  His strength is made perfect in weakness.